#im so sane and normal about her

[bluechanas]

miss nami just one chance please

[follyslittlebunny]

chat rate the new hoodie 🤗

[batunatu]

born to be a fnafhs kid, grow up to be a class of 09 teenager.

[separatist-apologist]

As everyone who knows me personally will attest, I am being so very normal about the Taylor Swift/Travis Kelce news.

[beegswaz]

ignore the filters its Near impawssible to see the art without it

so. vanny am i right

[doodle-or-die]

☆=(ゝω･)/

[todayisafridaynight]

Snap. Aoki plush. You can finally dunk him in milk

PLEAAAASE I WAS JUST ABOUT TO COME ON HERE AND POST ABOUT ITTTTTT

[hyp3rfixation-h3ll]

hi gang im being normal

[crescentmp3]

i promise im normal about her<-most lesbianest guy alive

[knightelf]

she is so pretty. pretty lavender princess cutely recounting the time her paramour killed all her friends at the dinner table waow

[battampria]

STARTS TWITCHING AND JUMPING EXCITEDLY AND TWIRLING BRO @dh-mpir LOOK LOOK AT THEM LOOK LOOK AT THE SILLIES LOOK AT THEM ALL OMGDNJKFGIL EUEUEUEEUU

I made some overwatch 2 stamps !!!

there are only stamps for the support role for now, but if you guys wanna use it just credit me !! :D

[misfortunegirl]

anyone who is inlove with me 👉👈

[m00nchildwrites]

Excuse me, but Xavier's Kitty Card is INSANE. He is so horny in it!

*~☆Spoilers Below☆~*

The dude is straight up moaning, blushing, and panting. The way I blushed like an innocent bean when he-

Like excuse me!!! And then he-

A lick and a kiss while moaning!?!?!? How am I supposed to function like a normal, sane human after that!?!?!?

He is unhinged!!! And now, I am a wreck. Surely, it can't amp up more and keep the rating. Im safe now... but NOPE. He just-

And I just straight up flat-lined. Like nothing going on in my head... except maybe a high-pitched scream because how dare he!?!? I am not ok. He really raked our hand down his chest to his 🍆 and said "rub me here. Make me purr." I- I wheezed. I seized. I fell to my knees...

And MC did too apparently. MC was just as done for because it fades to black after he gives us bedroom eyes that could melt anyone's panties off and then the very next scene is-

Man is weak-legged and suffering from sex hair. (Probably from MC running her hands through his hair because who tf could blame her?)

They have zero chill getting it on in Jeremy's greenhouse at Philos. Pretty sure Xavier would've been a smug little shit about it too, because he knows damned well your sounds were heard. Now everyone in a block radius knows Xavier just rocked your world.

(Jeremy can not make eye contact with you for like a month.)

[emdabitchass]

Ems 150 pt2 closed starter (you don’t have to do pt1 first)

(get ready this shits long)

It was campfire and every thing was normal, the younger campers we’re getting put to bed, the counselors we’re talking about tomorrows war games, it was all normal….

But where’s Em?

You turn around and see way in the back far away from everybody else Em with one ear on her shoulder and covering the other one with her hand while with her free hand she pulled at the grass. You were about to walk over to her and ask if they were okay, but that’s when they got up and walked into the Apollo cabin.

as soon as they walked in the lights turned out. You assumed they were just overstimulated and went to sleep..

gods, if only that was it

You saw a warm light slowly emerging from the Apollo cabin, that’s when you decided to check on Em

you walk in to see her asleep….. no….she was talking…. Only it wasn’t her voice… the voice was much deeper than Ems almost like one of a forty year old man

the voice spoke “Emma stop saying that, you are home”

“NO IM NOT YOU MONSTER STOP CALLING ME THAT” Ems voice had fought back

“but then where is?” A third voice asked. This voice was more androgynous than the other two.

“camp” Em said their voice shaky

“but then why do you keep running from it” the first voice said

“I-“ Em started silently crying “I don’t know it-“

they got cut off by the third voice “oh look it’s a little crybaby”

“IM NOT CRYING EPIALES AND IF I WAS ISNT THAT THE POINT OF YOUR NIGHTMARE BULLSHIT” Em said wipe tears from her face

Epiales you thought who could that be? No… it couldn’t child of nyx the personification of nightmares

“look Vernon” Epiales said “your kids so fuck pathetic she can’t even handle the truth. This is your home Emma”

“NO” Em screamed you had no clue how she was still asleep “I want to go home”

“oh but Em” her dad said “this is your home Emma please come back” Vernon pleaded

“never” Em said

oh great you thought Em wasn’t only possessed by the personification of nightmares but her living nightmare too, her step dad

That’s when Em opens her eyes and locks eyes with you

the two of you are frozen like that for a solid two minutes but as soon as you ask her if she’s okay she takes off sprinting out of the Apollo cabin into the woods you run after her just to be stopped by her older brother Braydon

“don’t” he says grabbing your wrist with tears in his eyes “give her time I heard it all”

Tags:

@demigod-jack-hearth

@the-smart-and-the-dumb-one

@of-course-im-the-winner

@i-was-never-sane

@ariathemortal

@smileyalater

[k0yaz]

ACKKKK HIII ITS THE ACHERON ANON AGAIN 😭😭

i just finished reading your acheron headcanons AND IM LITERALLY LOSING MY MIND IM SO GLAD SOMEONE ELSE IS INSANE ABOUT HER LIKE ME… AND THAT YOU THINK SHES A SWITCH? i’m so normal about this!1!1!1! anyway- while reading your hcs i had an absolutely deranged, down bad horny thought:

having her sprawled out under you, fucking her with your fingers and whispering in her ear, and calling her mei.

saying her name like a prayer while she digs her nails into you and cries and whimpers… telling her how much you love her, letting her fall apart in your hands and piece her back together 😵‍💫

anyways i will be back with more (very sane hebryegge) acheron thoughts ! for simplicity’s sake, could i be ur 🌺 anon? (i wish the flower was red like acherons but WHATEVER MAN.)

thank youuuu !

say it again.

Pairings: acheron x fem!reader

CW: nsfw, female reader, afab reader, dom reader, sub acheron, fingering, sesbian lex yeahhhhh, what’s the thing where you scratch someone’s back cause that’s in there too, tit sucking, use of acheron’s real name, I think I ate my fucking pillow writing this, I love acheron, I managed to write this decently without tea, not proofread.

A/N: YAYAYA ITS YOU AGAIN IM SO GLAD YOU CAME BACK FOR MORE ACHERON STUFFS honestly you’re so real for those freaky ass thoughts and also ofc you can be 🌺 anon <3 🕯️

Shallow strings of gasps echoed off the walls, casting a gentle sigh out of your throat as you felt a set of nails rake down your back. Your fingers plunged deeper as the ridges massaged Acheron’s walls, practically having a death grip on your fingers from how the hot velvety texture clenched around your digits.

You could tell. Each time you’d push and curl them up against that spongy spot within her, a mix between a whimper and a groan wrenched out of her throat. Warmth flooded your senses each time you saw her gorgeous form sprawled out below you, head tilted to the side and eyes squeezed shut in ecstasy as she rolled her hips up to match the pace of your fingers.

Acheron could certainly kill you if she wanted. She could turn you into a memory within mere moments. But she didn’t. She trusted you enough to do this to her. Acheron allowed you to see her in such a vulnerable state, leaving you to do whatever you pleased to her.

However, each drag of your fingers massaging her cunt wasn’t predatory nor rough. Rather, it was sweet—affectionate. You wanted her to feel a high which allowed her to bask in comfort within your grasp. You wanted to hear her cries of need and pleasure every time your fingers buried inside her cunt, while you whispered soothing praises into her reddish ears.

You giggled to yourself upon seeing how she was yearning for your touch, eager for you to fuck her into the mattress as she grasped you tightly against her. A shiver pulsed down your spine when you saw how adorably captivating Acheron’s reactions were. Still trying to maintain a composed front, yet crying out below you as a never ending stream of quiet groans and sobs were ripped out of her throat.

Your free hand circled below her breast, hot gasps brushing against the tip of your flushed nose as your teeth tugged on her bud lightly.

“You’re so gorgeous, Mei.”

Your remark made Acheron’s gaze flicker down to you, breathing growing quicker and shallow as she brought a hand to the back of your head to dig her fingers into your hair, pushing you deeper into her chest to encourage your sensual movements.

“Say it again. Please.” Acheron whispered, somehow being able to maintain her usual low voice through her irregular breathing and choked back whimpers. You only dragged your tongue along her breast in response, squeezing the soft flesh between your fingers as your other hand thrusted up into her continuously.

“Mei.” You muttered, face now raising level with her cheek as your warm breath caressed her cheek.

“Mei. Mei. Mei.”

Her name repeated past your lips like a mantra over and over, as Acheron only arched her back in response to your fingers’ fervent thrusts. As if she couldn’t be any more pleasantly ruined by you, your velvety tone of voice simply pushed her over the edge, finding a sense of solace and warmth enveloping her body at the sweet nothings seamlessly dripping from your lips.

“I love you so much, Mei. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Acheron had never seen words as anything important. They’d just been means of communication. A quick frequency vibrating and cutting through the air, much like her own sword. However these words uttered by you and only you seeped into her heart in a way she couldn’t understand. She didn’t understand any of this. Yet, it was welcome. Perhaps she would let you into your heart, because she loved you oh so dearly.

A guttural moan was ripped out of Acheron’s throat as she felt the tip of your fingers press against her sweet spot, her head tilting back into the cloud like pillows, and your lips ghosting her cheek. Her panting filled the room as her climax snapped inside her, the intense high gradually subsiding as you slowly withdrew your fingers, now painted with her fluids. You leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to her stomach as she let out a low hum in response, thighs clenching slightly upon feeling the dampened sheets below her.

“I won’t ever let you go, Mei.”

“That makes two of us, (Name).”

A/N: dude I am so happy with how this turned out even though I wrote this first thing in the morning also guys I swear I’m normal about acheron pls trust (no I’m not sub acheron is making me lose my shit I’m this close to climbing on the ceiling)

[mrslankyman]

Oh Darling

Alastor x (fem) Reader

word count: 2K

Fluff / more of a friendship

based on pilot alastor / slightly out of character

Working on part 2

✩⋆｡‧₊˚⭑˚₊‧｡⋆✩

Wasn’t everyday just so grand in Hell?

No.

It wasn’t.

Working at the Hazbin Hotel sure wasn’t making your days any grander. Being a room attendant and a good friend to Charlie was starting to get to you.

At least Nifty was there to help. Even though she mainly tried to kill the bugs she at least helped clean the place up. You had become accustomed to her weird and somewhat insane antics. It was Hell after all. You couldn’t really judge.

Husk was as fun as ever. Giving snarky comments but he at least listened when the night wound down and you needed a drink.

Angel Dust would joke around and tell you how awful you looked after scrubbing one of the rooms.

Vaggie didn’t say much since she knew you were friends with Charlie. She rather enjoyed your company stating you were one of the most sane sinners in the hotel.

Alastor on the other hand. Didn’t say much about you nor did he really say much about anyone. He would greet you just as anyone else. Something about him felt weirdly off.

You didn’t question it too much and just went on with your work.

“Hello Darling pleasure to be seeing you this morning!” That radio like voice echoed into the hotels kitchen. You were busy making breakfast.

Someone had to do it and it sure wasn’t gonna be Nifty. No one wants roaches in their pancakes.

“Good morning Alastor.” You answered not looking at him as you flipped the pancake. “Making up a lovely breakfast I do suppose? My mother used to make the most splendid ones in her time.” He remarked as his shadow loomed over you from behind.

“I’m sure she did. I’m not so positive mine will beat your mothers but it will beat your hunger.” Your joke was met with that signature smile as you turned around.

“Ahaha Im sure it will.” He laughed as he stepped aside to give you room. “I came to see if you were able to dust my radio tower? It has accumulated quite a bit of dust.” His question wasn’t really a question. You’d have to do it. It was your job. Though it was nice that he wasn’t demanding.

“Yes I can. I’ll just have to finish up breakfast.” You stated as you went back to cooking.

“Lovely. Oh and {Y/N}.” He cooed making you turn to look at him. His eyes turned dark and black, red static glitched around him. The room turned dark. “Don’t mess with my things.” He warned his clock eyes appearing and his smile widening.

You nodded quickly and looked around. You had seen him do this before but never to you directly. “Yes sir. I won’t.” You answered quickly and sighed with relief as he went back to normal.

“Good.” He clapped his hands together and turned away. “I’ll be back once breakfast is done.” He waved and hummed as he walked out of the kitchen.

You went back to cooking. Just forgetting about what just happened. It was best to just act like it was normal.

——

With breakfast done. You headed off to do your job. Or well request in better words. You grabbed your dusting supplied and went up to Alastors radio tower.

Doing as asked you just dusted. Not moving much of his stuff just the things that needed to be moved to dust. Hopefully he wouldn’t be too mad about that.

Surely he understood if you had to move stuff to be able an do your job. If not I guess you would have to run to Charlie and hide.

While dusting two figures on his desk caught your attention.

A small deer next to a bigger one. Which resembled a doe. Apart if you just assumed he kept up with the deer aesthetic he had going.

Shrugging you dusted them and headed out of the room. Closing the door and headed down stairs to put your supplies up.

——

Nifty was off cleaning somewhere. Husk and Angel Dust were chatting at the bar. Charlie had gone off with Vaggie for the night and who knows where Alastor was.

Deciding that cooking dinner sounded like a good idea you found your self in the kitchen again. Perhaps Charlie should’ve made you the chef instead. Though you just picked up both the jobs. Cleaning was easy and cooking was fun.

Humming you skimmed through a cook book. Unsure of what to cook for the night. That was until a shadow appeared behind you and Alastor appeared.

“Hello Dear!” His enthusiastic voice echoed through the kitchen causing you to turn around and look at him. “I saw you finished dusting. Thank you.” He leaned again the counter. Checking out his claws with a smile. “Need help cooking?” He questioned before looking over at you.

“Just having trouble picking what to cook for tonight.” You answered with a shrug. Making him stand up straight and clap his hands together.

“Why I know just the thing!” He snatched the cook book from you and threw it behind him. A loud thud echoed as it hit the ground.

“Hey-“ he put a finger over your mouth and laughed.

“My mother once showed me a lovely recipe for jambalaya! Who needs a flimsy old cook book when you have memory darling.” He chuckled and nudged you aside as he grabbed all the things he needed.

“I can show you it. If you wish.” He titled his head. Offering to let you in on one of his favorite things.

Something you didn’t suspect but found it rather kind of him.

“Sure. I’d love to learn it.” You agreed and stood beside him as he instructed you on things and gave insight on how to make the ‘best jambalaya you’ll ever eat.’

As he stated.

—

“My mother loved cooking this. Said it was her favorite dish, yes it was.” He smiled wide. A rather genuine smile. Not like the one he always wore. He looked down at the finished dish. A sigh of content escaping his lips.

“I’m sure she was a lovely woman.” You commented grabbing a plate from the cabinet.

He didn’t answer, just hummed. The silence was rather loud. He just stood there for a moment. Lost in memory.

“She was..she really was.” Though his voice sounded rather sad he still held the smile. The never erasing smile.

His reply was late but you put some of the finished jambalaya on a plate. His tone shifting to one of excitement.

“I’m sure you’ll find it splendid.” He turned to you and titled his head. Waiting for you to take a bite.

You moved the spoon up to your mouth and took a bite. Your eyes widened and a smile spread across your face.

It tasted lovely, better than you expected.

His smile stretched further as he watched your reaction.

“Oh I knew you’d love it! It’s very splendid don’t you think? Yes yes, a rather grand recipe the best recipe!” He wrapped his arms around your shoulder. Stretching his arm out in-front of you both and curling his fingers into the palm of his hand.

“I’m sure you agree this is better than some flimsy thing from that old cook book. I can show you many other recipes my mother showed me.” He leaned into your face a smile stuck on his face.

He had never been this touchy so he must be excited.

You nodded in agreement. The idea of having someone to cook with wasn’t a bad one.

“I’d like that.” You laughed and he joined in. Laughing with you for once not feeling like he had to be towering over someone to be seen.

——

So cooking together became a daily occurrence. Wether it be breakfast lunch or dinner. It didn’t matter.

He found cooking with you pleasing. You were one of the only demons he could stand in the hotels.

He slowly began to tell you more about his life. How he and his mother were close. Though it seemed he dodged the questions of his father. Never wanting to talk of him.

Which was understandable from what you could possibly piece together it seemed his dad wasn’t the best.

You decided not to push its.

“So my dear, have you considered being redeemed?” His question made you think. You were both outside looking up at the sky. Dinner was done. And everyone had went to their rooms. You on the other hand weren’t tired and Alastor didn’t have any plans for tomorrow so staying up with you didn’t bother him.

“I suppose it would be nice. Though I’m not sure I would fit in up there.” You shrugged leaning against the railing of his balcony.

He hummed and looked down. “You’re a rather charming demon belle. I don’t see why you wouldn’t fit in.” He chuckled to himself. He didn’t believe in that wacky nonsense of being redeemed.

How could a sinner go to heaven? They had chosen their path in their life time.

He learned that you had killed your husband at the time. Caught him cheating and decided to take his life as well as the other woman. You made your choice in that moment.

Dooming yourself to a life of sin. Just as he had when he committed all his murders.

Though a part of him feared the idea of redemption now. He knew he sure as hell wouldn’t be redeemed. He didn’t feel bad for his crimes. Nor did he care.

But apart of him knew you regretted your actions. You were a soul who would deserve to be redeemed if there was a way.

That scared him.

Knowing he wasn’t in control. Knowing that you could slip out of his hands.

He wasn’t being selfish with his want of keeping you. He just liked having someone around who enjoyed his company. Someone who wasn’t scared of him or only chatted with him cause they didn’t wanna be killed.

Though that is rather selfish isn’t it? Not wanting someone to succeed and be a better version of themself because you want them to stay as they are.

“I’m sure you’d fit in just swell so don’t you worry your pretty little head about it.” He flashed a smile your way. Teeth not showing this time. It seemed almost fake. You shrugged.

“I guess. I would miss everyone here though.. mainly you.” Your words hit him like a brick. He hasn’t suspected you to really truly care about him. Sure you said you two were friends but.. this meant a lot.

“Oh come now. You wouldn’t miss me once you see all the.. heavenly things up there.” He chucked. His voice sounded off and his radio effect faltered.

“Are you okay Alastor? It’s not like I’m gonna be redeemed and even if I was I would miss you. So don’t say I wouldn’t.” You were slightly annoyed at him now. Of course you’d miss him. No amount of heavenly items or ideals would ever top him and his terrible old timey jokes.

“Don’t lie. We’re in Hell why lie? You’re already here! It’s not like it’s gonna send you further down!” He seethed his claws digging into the railing.

“Alastor calm down. Why are you so upset?” You stepped closer to the demon. His ears bent back and his pupils went small. His smile crinkled and his teeth bared.

“You! You have me so confused!” He ran his hand through his hair. Closing his eyes.

“I’ve never felt like this before.. it’s all so frustrating. I’m supposed to make you scared! Don’t you fear me?” He dropped his hand and laughed. A hysteric laugh.

“Alastor..I don’t fear you.. I see you for you.. you’re an amazing friend.” You laid your hand on his shoulder. Calming him down slightly.

“I’m just here to watch these souls suffer and try to climb up only to fall into the fiery pits of failure.. but the pleasure in watching others fail isn’t fun when it comes to you.” He turned his head to look at you.

Your eyes met and for once the smile that was on his face didn’t match what was showing in his eyes.

“A part of me just wants to be with you forever. Just blissfully cooking or chatting like we are now. I’ve never had that.. I have friends but not like this.” He sighed and leaned back against the wall letting himself slide down.

You sat down beside him. Looking at the sky.

“Are those deer figures on your desk you and your mother?” You asked softly.

“Yeah..” he answered.

“They’re lovely.” You held his hand. Smiling as he squeezed yours.

“I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. You can relax. I’m gonna be here with you. So stop being all sad. It doesn’t suite you.” You leaned against his shoulder. Receiving a sigh from him.

“Did I ever tell you about my first radio show appearance?” He asked after a few moments of silence.

“No I don’t believe you did.” You smiled and listened as he began the story.